I hate the emergency room

I know, most people hate the emergency room. But not like me. See, they come in, wait several hours, and then get substandard care. So they hate it. Me, I'm the one who makes them wait several hours. I don't think I give substandard care, but that's not for me to judge.

But how many fevers can one person see in a night before he gets jaded? Kids get fevers. It's what they do. You give them a cold, and instead of the sniffles, they get a fever. But parents get scared and bring their kids in at 11 pm. At which time there are no rooms in the ER to see kids, since the place is packed with adults with various equally unsatisfying complaints, like back pain. It may sound callous to some, but I just get fed up with counseling parents about their child's viral illness. Keep fever down, make sure he/she is drinking ok, it's ok not to eat when they're sick, make sure he/she pees once in a while. Call if he/she still has a fever in 3 days. At which time I'll give you the same advice again.

So in 1 month, I'm going to be in the ICU for good, and I won't have to deal with any viruses, except maybe my own kids' one day. I can guarantee I won't show up in the ER with my kid at 11 at night.